Roles · Power
Top
What it is
A Top is the one doing things to a partner: tying, spanking, teasing, touching. It's about the action, not who's in charge.
What it can look like
Running the rope, holding the flogger, using a toy on a partner. Sometimes at their own pace, sometimes exactly as the bottom asked.
Often pairs with
Not the same as
Dominant. A Top can take requests from the bottom and still be the one doing everything. See also Service top.
Doing it safely
You're the one with your hands on the controls, so you need to know how to use them. Learn the basics of whatever you're doing, watch your partner's body language, and check in.
Talking about it
"I'd love to be the one doing things to you. What would you like?"
Basics covers consent, safewords, limits and aftercare for every role.